Hello friends,
Life sure is a crazy journey, don’t you think? Filled with moments of joy and pain, it weaves a unique tapestry for each of us. In my own life, motherhood has played a significant role in shaping my experiences.
When I was 17, I faced the heart-wrenching pain of losing my first child. As many of us often do with pain, I pushed it deep inside me, letting it simmer silently. But life continued on and soon I was blessed with my son. Unfortunately, his father and I did not work out, so we divorced, and so, in my quest to provide him a better future, I enlisted in the military. However, our time together was cut short, and not of my own volition. Rather a bitter cocktail of my ex-husband’s decision and my own misguided belief (you know how we can sometimes be our worst critics, right?) that led me to think my ex-husband was right; my son would be better off without me in the picture. I haven’t seen him since he was 3. Dealing with the guilt of that separation was soul crushing.
Over time, I made many mistakes and caused hurt for both myself and others – that’s just a part of life. I broke up a family, an unhealthy and toxic one. But nonetheless I did that. I contributed to the division of parents and children, just like what had been done to me. This realization absolutely wrecked me. But through these experiences, I found opportunities to grow and evolve as a person.
My daughter’s birth later filled my life with happiness and joy. Her arrival felt like the universe had given me another chance to embrace motherhood. It also became a turning point in my journey, urging me to revisit the wounds of my past. I came to realize that I needed to confront the long-hidden pain of both my motherhood journey and my own childhood, for the sake of my wellbeing and that of my children.
As I struggled with the challenges that accompanied suppressed emotional wounds, my health began to suffer. My body started to feel as though it was failing me, making it even more difficult to give my daughter the love and care she needed. This realization led me to holistic healing, a practice that allowed me to address past traumas with compassion and empathy for myself. By acknowledging my life story in all its complexity—including the good, bad, and everything in between—I found a path toward healing and a deeper understanding of my true self.
Now, as I continue on this journey of motherhood, I have come to realize that healing isn’t a linear progression but an ongoing process of growth and evolution.
I hope you’ll remember, my friends, that every life experience, whether painful or not, helps shape us into the unique individuals we are meant to be. By combining the wisdom of the past with today’s scientific advancements, we can find our own paths toward self-improvement and healing. Together, let us navigate this intricate tapestry of life with kindness and compassion, working toward a more empathetic world.